Internet update and a FAB idea!

Ok so I went without the world wide web for almost a whole TWO weeks...I know the first week was totally voluntary and I thought it would do me some good to refocus, really take in my daily activities and such, and well I guess it did. Until that is, I realized that due to our move I wouldn't have Internet for ANOTHER week! Ughh I missed it. It's somewhat of an escape for me. Maybe it is for you too? However, I still stand by the process of making important things come first...you know, the whole do your dishes, throw in a load of laundry, read your child a book and such, before sitting down to chat with your bff on fb after just getting off the phone with her 15 minutes before while doing hohum chores...I don't know, just a personal opinion I guess.

ANYWAY on to more important things...Like my FAB idea, that really wasn't my idea. However it was an idea made for me by one of my besties. And since I actually am the one who has followed through on it... I shall claim it as my own from here on out:) (thanks Angela!)

I LOVE to journal. I have a ton of them. I still have my very first diary from the age of 11, which by the way I may burn on my death bed. They really are so embarrassing, but so very hilarious. I can't tell you how many little boys I proclaimed to "love" and the pure DRAMA that was written throughout the years.

I have a mad journal. Ummm I don't really "encourage" this kind of journal however. It tends to piss you off all over again about things you have long since forgotten.

I have journals filled with my deepest secrets, desires and dreams. I have online journals.  I even have a "spiritual" journal, which lets be honest here...this is the only one I will make copies of for my children when I'm 80.

I also have a journal that is just about my kids. On one side it reads "it was the best of times" and then you flip it over and on the other side it reads "it was the worst of times". You of course would make an entry on either side and then eventually they come together. Maybe you've seen one like this? I can't wait to fill it!

The sad sad truth here is that I don't make as much time as I use to for my journaling. Some days seem to run together and before I know it I've had all these moments that I should have written about, that I just didn't take time to.

This my dear friends is where that FAB idea comes into play. We are all busy! However, I know your kids are just as HILARIOUS and adorable as mine. We have to cherish those moments by writing them down so that we can remember them FOREVER!

Get yourself an index card box. Fill it with blank index cards. Tape a pen to the top of the box and place the box on your kitchen counter, for easy access. Anytime the kids do something that you just don't want to ever forget...a cute smile, nice manners, choice of clothing, funny sayings...write them on a card and date it with the child's name at the top (or somewhere on it), once you fill a box, get another. Eventually you will have enough on each child to fill an individual box of their own individual fun stories from when they were little on up. It will be a cherished item for everyone in the family! Guaranteed or your money back! This idea only takes a few dollars and a few moments. Do it!

Background Noise...

S@HM Amy and Myself decided to institute for our very own sanity a "NO INTERNET WEEK". A challenge we would like all of our S@HM 's to take!

So we would love for you to join us in this challenge too! We will return Monday April 25th and hope to share with you some of our fun experiences we were able to have without the entertainment of the Internet.

Possibly a little extra time for some much needed attention to our homes. Time for one on one with each child without any distractions. And maybe even a conversation with our husbands that doesn't include "today's facebook status'" ha!

Have a fun week and please share with us your feelings about stepping back and refocusing on our facebook page NEXT Monday:)

Sometimes I wonder... "How am I doing as a mom?"

You know, a little self reflection. As mothers we don't get a yearly review that comes with a 6% increase in our salary. However, we do have the opportunity to recognize the ques from our children as frequent as we would like. Those times when they do something and we didn't "ask" them to or prompt them at all. The moments when they don't know we are listening or looking. These are the times I fully take in how I am doing as a mom.

I admit, there are times when I am embarrassed by how they are acting or responding to a situation. I really have to take a step back in those moments and figure out  a new way to do things or a way to approach them differently about something I thought was pretty clear.

Then I have my very PROUD mommy moments, which have been of great frequency lately. Maybe it's the weather or something, but I feel like I just walked out of my yearly review with a 50% increase in my salary!

I have to share with you how I've done:

Belle said to me yesterday "I want to be a mommy just like you" greatest compliment a mother could have! I realize she is only 3 and doesn't see all of my imperfections, but hearing that from my daughter was so awesome and it came out of nowhere!

Matthew just in the last couple of weeks has made some wonderful choices! It seems he is really growing up and thinking about others. Just yesterday he found his sister at church and held her hand as they walked down the hallway looking for us. It was crowded and we were new to this building, but when I spotted him among strangers with his hand tightly in hers leading the way,  I couldn't help but feel overwhelmed with complete pride in what Matt and I have been trying to teach him..."take care of your sister Matthew"...turns out, he does! It brought tears to my eyes.

Kenny is really just a natural pleaser. I get wonderful feedback as a mother from this child ALL the time! I'd like to believe it is me and all the hard work and effort I've put into raising him, but the truth really is, he is just so stinking sweet and caring all on his own! Thank goodness for that, it really helps my self-assessment! ha!

When you witness a moment by your child that has made you proud, let them know and then remind yourself how AMAZING of a job you are doing!

YES!!!

My good friend Mandy sent me this via text this last week:

"Sometimes the best thing you can do as a mother is to remember what it was like to be a child."

What does it mean to you "to remember what it was like to be a child"?

To me it means JOY! Pure and simple joy in every moment.

It means having an idea and then doing it with no hesitation or reservation.

Like being a singing/dancing star and gathering your cousins or neighbors together and putting on a big show for everyone to see!

Or building a fort out of old sheets, boxes and long sticks, rocks, hay and anything else you can find! 

It means mud wrestling with your barbie dolls and running around in the rain and splashing through puddles!

Or walking around in  big high heels with way too much lip gloss on but feeling so VERY glamorous!

These are just a few memories that come from my childhood. As a mom I couldn't help but think about them as this quote kept entering into my mind. I then thought..."how can I as a mom help my children to be all that they can dream up as a child?"

Well, the same day after Mandy sent me this text I went to my son's book fair at school and came across this adorable book:



Adorable read by Amy Krouse Rosenthal & Tom Lichtenheld

 This book was the answer to my previous question. I can say "YES" more! So as we went about our weekend I found myself consciously thinking "how can I say YES instead of no, maybe, next time etc...?"

This doesn't mean I allowed my children to do whatever whenever. I just simply allowed their creativity room to grow!

"Mom can we play in the boxes?"....Sure

"Mom, wanna play hide and seek?"...Absolutely!

"Mom, can we have another Popsicle?"...Yep

"Mom can I have spiky hair?"...Sounds awesome!

Do you see how saying YES is more fun for all of us?!!

Having a day of complete rebelliousness...against responsibility

There is much to do in this world of mine.

You see, we are right in the middle of selling and buying our home.

I need boxes and a grand plan.

I have phone calls and beds to make.

Walls to repair and relationships too.

Mountains of laundry and stress higher still.

Instead...

I've decide to just sit....and be.

this morning i woke up to this on my refrigerator

it was just what i needed...



there are days when matt and i  just don't get along and i just want to strangle that man! 

then there are days...like today, that a simple note helps me to feel appreciated and super loved!

what is your secret to helping your spouse feel special?

something to think about

i know my post is SUPER late today...but you should forgive me because i was busy packing and driving my children to meet their grandparents, who met us halfway, so that they could spend their spring break with them! that's right i have a full 3 maybe 4 days (depending on how it goes) all to myself!!! can you believe it? so awesome! so what in the world should i do with my time off?

as i drove the opposite direction that my children were going i wanted to be elated, joyous and thrilled. however, a sadness came over me. like a panic. "what am i doing" i thought, and then i started to cry and i started playing the "what if" game. you know that game right? it's the game all mothers everywhere play ALL the time!

what if they get in an accident?

what if someone hurts them?

what if they forget to brush their teeth?

what if belle's hair is a mess the whole time?

what if matt and i die while they are in someone else's care?

STOP!!!

what if matt and i die?!?! what if matt and i die? who will take care of my babies?

i panic and cry some more and realize we have got to make a will like yesterday!

so in my emotional state i call my sister in law. i try to remain calm and speak casually and then it all came out and i asked her for a huge favor and i told her i would be ETERNALLY grateful to her and then i cried as i asked her...

"melissa, if matt and i die in like some freak accident, will you take care of my children and love them and teach them everything i want them to know and hold them and make them go to college?"

she said she would be honored...and i know she would be.

now on to making plans for that will! AND on to living up the next 3 days!

sleeping arrangements...yaaawwwnnn!

does reading the word "Yawn" make you yawn the way that seeing someone yawn makes you yawn? it does me! So lets all YAAAWWWNNN together.

i am admittedly probably a little more on the selfish and mean side of most mothers. i say this because...it's true, and i'm not in denial about the issues i have. however too, i feel that i am just fine with who i am and how i mother my children. i actually think i mother wonderfully better than other mothers. i know...laugh it up, but i am the best mom for these little people who fill my world. how do i know that? b/c "i AM their mother" (that's from TOFW 2010 Memphis, whoop whoop). anyway i go into my own selfishness and meanness only to explain the reason behind the madness...

low tolerance-that's how i would describe my ability to handle children sleeping in my bed! it's my bed. i bought them each a bed and they should sleep in it. even when the kids were infants i didn't do the whole co-sleeping thing or even the bassinet in my bedroom. i didn't want to hear every coo and cry. if i needed to nurse or give them a bottle i got up walked to their room sat in the rocking chair did the business and then laid them back in THEIR bed. i wanted to keep things as "normal" as possible for matt and i. i wanted to soak up every minute, and every second of sleep i could get. i wanted and still want my room for me. i share EVERYthing else in my life, but my room, my bed....i just can't do it. i have to have this place for matt and i.

recently we've had sneaky kids getting into our bed in the middle of the night. most frequently its a little girl we call belle. she will get scared or have a pee accident in her bed and then just climbs right in as if she were invited. imagine that. once in awhile it will be the boys hoping in. shoving their feet into my side or their head on my stomach or their butt into my back. this is just unacceptable behavior. i mean i get the whole monsters in the closet, bad dreams and such, but REALLY climb into your brothers bed!

sometimes i lock our door so they can't get in during the night if they do wake up. better yet, sometimes i lock their door so that if they wake up in the middle of the night, in their sleepy slumber, they won't be able to figure out how to unlock it and then turn around and get back in their bed. i actually think it works.

at this point you may be questioning if i even love my children. the answer is yes, of course. i do love snuggling and cuddling and napping with my babies. however, my stance on our sleeping arrangement will always remain the same...sleep in your own bed or i will give it to a little child who will. yawn.

Before kids...

So I've been thinking... what DID I do before THEM (my children)?! I'm stumped I really don't know, but I DO know what I didn't do before I had kids.

Uh one thing is FOR SURE I did not wipe butts! No way, no how! Not even for the cutest of my nieces or nephews!

I didn't allot "extra" time in my day just for meltdowns. Although I probably should have!

I didn't have a membership to every child entertainment facility in town. you know...the zoo, discovery center, wonders of wildlife, jump mania, pool etc...

I didn't fret over holding hands in parking lots or freak out when I saw a speeding car.

I didn't think that I would ever allow the t.v. to babysit "my kids". Turns out, it's my favorite form of distraction for...my kids.

I didn't value my sleep, or my "alone" time, or the sound of complete stillness.

I didn't look at other women as soldiers of the same army.

I didn't know how love multiplied.

I didn't have little faces to remind me of the goodness of this life.

I didn't cry as much OR laugh as much!

I'm so grateful I no longer have a life "before kids"!

Aww it's VALENTINES DAY!!!

Actually I am like the Grinch that stole Christmas on Valentines Day. I know it's sad, but I just don't get too wrapped up in this holiday. Flowers, jewelry etc...just don't do it for me. I won't get on my soap box....with that said, I do enjoy MAKING homemade valentines for my kids and hubby. I guess it's maybe just the commercialization of the holiday I don't like.

So last night we geared up for a long crafty, glitter, glue making session at the table. I have to say our Valentine cards are perfect!

If you feel the same way that I do, try getting creative with the things you have at home. Expressing our love for one another is something we should do daily, but it's always fun to put a little sparklie on it! You still have all day to MAKE a fun card for those little people and honey you LOVE so much!!! Happy Valentines Day!

Hair extensions, snow days and the twilight zone...

I keep catching myself in this weird funk. I don't know what it is but it feels kind of like a twilight zone. Like I've been here before but I haven't,  and I'm not really sure what is going on around me. It frequently hits me when I hear my kids calling "MOM", "mom", "mommy", "mother". There are times I don't respond because I don't realize they are calling for me! I think "Am I the mom?" It scares me, but at the same time it surprises me and excites me. It freaks me out but it also brings me back to "earth". You would think by now this name would be so natural and easy to respond to. Maybe it's just a phase. Do you ever forget that YOU are "the mom"?

Speaking of "twilight zone" and hair extensions...I got my husband to do this: (i think he liked it)

Isn't he adorable?!

Snow days. Need I say more? Boo! Don't give me the "I love spending time with my kids" crap. I mean really? I love spending time with my kids too, but I'd much rather them be in school learning and growing their brains! This is what our snow days look like...

wake up, eat, play wii, watch a movie, play wii, eat, play with toys, play wii, eat, play wii =MUSH!

Well, well, well

Not all the way, but so much better. Oh I'm sorry, "Well" is how I'm feeling after ONE WEEK in bed with the nasty flu. The evening after my post last week, all plans of going "BIG" for our celebration of 50 went down the toilet along with alot of other things that literally made their way to the same destination. I know, gross right?

My apologies to S@HM Jaz! I had my club picked out and the 80's slow dance song! Too bad;( However, between the other ideas ALL 6 of them...Wahoo for our six followers OK OK actually 4...only 4 eligible comments!!! Oh wait I thought we were celebrating 50? Funny. I have decided that a GIFT CARD is in order...

A gift card to a totally practical place, a place we like to call TARGET!

And the WINNER of THE GIFT CARD FROM TARGET IS........................

well first let me share how the winner was determined

1. i found a pen in my purse and a mcdonalds receipt
2. i numbered 1-4 on the back of the mcdonald receipt
3. 4 not 6 because two comments were ineligible
4. i put the papers in a box
5. Belle did the honor of picking one out

Comment #4 WINS..That would be LEIA!!

Leia please contact me with your address via fb or email. CONGRATS!!!

50 Followers!!!

Pretty awesome!

I think it deserves a bit of a celebration! Don't you?!?

So in honor of of all of you our fellow S@HM's , ALL 50!!! and all of us who blog, I am going to sacrifice myself.

I will however, need some creative energy sent my way (uh some suggestions)!

Just how will I go about this totally random act of kindness???...will it be by means of a gift card sent to one of our lucky followers, something hilarious/slightly embarrassing that you've wanted to do that I'll do for you (with proof by way of pictures), a handmade (not by me of course) item that will be totally rockin'!

Ok so now it's your turn! Make a comment on what YOU want ME to do!

This will be fun!

..and REMEMBER you become eligible to win by making a suggestion!

Oh Lucy.

In our family...we call these my "Lucy" moments:

 Clogged sink due to me being totally oblivious to the fact that I didn't put a strainer in the sink prior to trying to drain the water off of the noodles. I just dumped the whole pot in the sink and then turned around like it was normal, looked at the stove and then back at the sink and...*sigh*

I immediately thought "It's Tuesday, Mcdonalds happy meal night. I should just go get happy meals." However, my determination to make the BEST mac and cheese this side of Rogersville pushed through. I envisioned my boys being married and telling their wives that their Mom, makes the most Delicious mac and cheese! I could hear Belle calling me one day and asking "Mom, can I have your recipe? I just love that stuff!"

So I did what any other INSANE mother would do...I filled my pot back up, started fresh, excited that I could still pull it off.  AND low and behold my Velveeta cheese that was in the pantry...expired 6 MONTHS AGO! *SIGH* "OK" I thought, "I will just use up the cheese in the fridge. I have tons." I whipped it all up, put it in the oven and was so certain, so certain that my creation THREE cheese mac and cheese was gonna be a hit! I mean like Panera mac and cheese kind of "hit"!

No one liked it, and I believe I even heard "gross" come out of the mouths of those babes. We threw it in the trash. I then gave them a lecture on the starving children in Africa.

The only thing that came out of that dinner night was a good laugh for Matt and some clogged pipes!

Getting "in the mood"...

to be domestic is sometimes a challenge for me. It's not one of my natural talents, in fact I'm still trying to discover those "natural" talents I'm supposed to have! However, that doesn't mean I keep a dirty home or never make family dinners. It just simply means...I have a hard time finding EXCITEMENT in it all. I mean does anyone, really? The dusting, laundry, dishes, organizing, toilets, window washings, sweeping etc...yeah I pretty much would rather...um do anything else.  So when it comes to this area of motherhood, you know the responsible "keep things tidy" part...I am ALWAYS looking for a little motivation! This week I found that motivation in the power of THE APRON!!! I know it sounds funny, but YOU should try it! Put an apron on and just see...it's like a magic hat or something!


I felt like this lady AND you WILL too! Isn't she gorgeous?!

June Cleaver



Sunny Martin



I mean we are pretty much the same. Don't you think? Ladies, put your aprons on and get to work! Go ahead and pretend YOU are June Cleaver!

I realized something...New Year Resolutions are ALWAYS made up of either... Health (any kind...exercise, spiritual, mental, relationships.. etc..) or WEALTH (savings, paying debt off, planning..etc..)! Amazing!

Don't you find that to be fascinating too? We all want to be better and have another chance at something and a reason to start over. It's not every day EVERYONE around you is "ok" with putting the past YEAR behind you and wiping the slate clean! So exciting!

I can be a BETTER mommy this year! (health)

I won't shop as much and I will give myself more pedicures! (wealth)

I will drink lots and lots of water! ( health)

My husband will now be the bill payer...give him a stab at making the best of things! ( wealth)

I could go on and on of the the new person I want to be.... ( i like dots.... have you noticed?)...

 AND then...

I have a BIGGER thought and I talk to myself "well Sunny, you know that through the miracle of forgiveness and the atonement of Jesus Christ you can ALWAYS begin anew". I can always become better EVEN in the middle of JULY! What?! It's true.

Matt and my new motto is "do your best, and forget the rest" (we stole that from the p90x workouts;) but it works...the saying works for us! In ALL areas of our life, if we are doing our best, we CAN forget the rest, AND through the Lord, you will gain all that you need.

So in February when all the excitement of Christmas and the New Year have passed, and you have broken EVERY resolution you made...don't throw your arms in the air and walk away and wait for 2012!...Keep at it!

Santa's list of shopping etiquettes...

Say "please", "thank you" AND "excuse me"

Smile

 Have patience with those around you.

Don't "cut" in line.

Find a quarter, dime or nickel and donate to the red bucket...don't just walk by.

Hang up your PHONE and quit TEXTING when its your turn to check out. 

Use the customer service desk for major issues. Don't hold up the line for 20min b/c you "have a question"

And ALWAYS give MORE than you receive

Happy Shopping My CO-SANTA'S

one foot in front of the other...ITS MONDAY

I feel like I'm on a freaking hamster wheel lately and I'm sure you've felt that way too, especially with the holidays upon us. So on this delightful a.m. I will just show you what I'm up against today, and maybe it will help me get something accomplished, and help you to not feel so bad about what you've got on your list of must do's! Happy turning of the wheel:)

Of course: laundry, beds, rooms, bills and groceries...but mixed in with that we all know we still have to bathe ourselves and the kids, and feed them too!?!?

So....

I'm guilty. I know you're wondering "of what?", or maybe some of you may be saying "of course you are", but here is the deal.... I am a Dr. Phil watcher (but that's not what I'm pleading guilty to)...actually I dvr it and then when I'm bored I go back through and watch the ones that I may be interested in. As my children and husband were all nestled in their beds the other I night I stayed up and watched the boob tube and came across this:

http://drphil.com/videos/?Url=/house/flv/9009_2.flv&background=header_drphil_video.jpg

WOW! I mean really? I'm sure you'll be taken back initially just like I was. My defense was immediately for the children, but then as I watched more I heard more in her voice than the volume of it. She wasn't beating her children or calling them nasty names. She was purely out of control with her emotion, loneliness and longing for some simplicity. She did yell way too much, but honestly I caught little glimpses of myself. How crazy, how exhausting. I don't like to yell and I don't yell most of the time...(anymore), but when I do it kind of just happens and once I get started it's hard for me to take a step back and let things cool down. As I watched this whole episode which aired on Thursday December 02, for those of you who want to go take a look, I realized just how toxic it is to yell at my children, and how unnecessary it is too. It hit me in the right spot at the right time and there were great pointers that helped me think about how I could be better. The show was actually titled " brat proof your child". Obviously I would have given it a different title...like "how to stop yelling", "how to overcome the sound of your own crazy", "how to have happier children" etc..b/c really if we are really real with ourselves...we all know that it isn't the child.

There is this new..er country song that states "all you need is love". It talks about living in a van and such... and how that would be OK b/c "all you need is love".  Call me unromantic or a pessimist or self-centered or whatever, but this saying has never settled well with me. Maybe I just can't grasp the concept of "only" needing love, maybe I've never loved another enough that I feel like I could survive off of that alone or maybe I'm reading too much into the saying...

However, just recently I learned to love deeper than I ever have. I know we all have an intense love for our children. It's immeasurable. It's true too, that it multiplies with each child, and love for one child in no way takes from the love of the other child. But this deeper love that I've been feeling, has everything to do with my husband. I married him because he was perfect. With all of my heart I truly believed he was perfect, at least for me. For years I've held him to this same standard in which I found him...perfection. He was never allowed to say the "wrong" thing, look at me cross, or heaven forbid he have a "bad day" without me having a freak out on him (this is not the part for you to say "awww poor Matt", really he has got it good) I mean why would he do those things if he were perfect? I know laugh it up, but it's true. For our whole marriage this expectation in my brain, that I made up all on my own has caused me so much trouble. Logically I knew that he wasn't perfect, but I never connected my heart and my head...until I just did one day. I had the most amazing thought..."wouldn't it be amazing if I had as much compassion for him as I do for the lonely guy I see on the street begging for money, or the guy I pass in the store that looks like he has no pride at all? If I could love him in his weakest moments and listen to what he is really saying when I see frustration in his eyes?" Since having that thought, I got my opportunity, probably an answer to my prayers to show a Christlike love toward him. A true opportunity to understand the beauty of humility and compassion for the one person I do love more than life. It's a little embarrassing to me that for all this time I could treat a complete stranger with more empathy than I did my own husband, but I'm so grateful I finally came into this moment. Life is so so so much easier when we allow those we love to make mistakes.

So you may ask "Sunny do you now believe all you need is love"?  And I would say....."Nope, I still need the man to bring a paycheck home so that I can get my hair and nails done, buy a new purse and also some cute shoes." I mean really? It takes more than love;)