i've heard this day was coming...ever since that february morning in 2000, when the ultrasound tech said "it's a boy!"...people told me, prepared me, warned me.
the part they all left out was that it literally happens overnight. or overday. i sent my 11 year-old son off to school with a mid-morning snack and a sensible lunch. he returned home, famished and near to death, and proceeded to eat me out of house and home.
this is not a joke. the eating!!!! hollow legs are real, i have a testimony of that.
and just when i thought i could count on my firstborn to manage the saturday morning cereal extravaganza--while i got a few more zzz's--he started...sleeping in?! since when did a child of mine appreciate snoozing past sunrise?
it's going to happen to you one day, ya know. the legend of sleepy hollow...
Tuesday, November 29, 2011
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
in the mirror
I've never been one to look at my reflection in the mirror and gasp in horror. I'm fine with my appearance for the most part. I mean, I wouldn't mind a little lift, tuck or shot of botox just for fun, but I'm certainly comfortable with who I am physically (well aside from my normal pregnancy freakouts about the amount of LBS I've put on)...Today, however, as I glanced at myself while washing my hands I had the strangest feeling. Not one of "who are you?", or "You need some fixin up.", but one of "DANG, you are a MOM!". I know, it's a little bit late for that revelation, and maybe it's my hormones talking as I'm gearing up to birth my fourth child. I just can't shake the thought that I. AM. A. MOM.
...what the heck?
Also, lately when my children are calling for me or talking to me or expecting motherly things out of me...I have been so caught off guard. Like maybe there is someone standing behind me they are talking to, or they have mistaken me for another woman, or I am in a wicked time zone and everyone around me has everything all wrong and that in fact I'm not a mom
...just a girl who needs a mothers love too.
Maybe the true feelings here are those of a young girl, who just went along with life, grew into a woman and somehow is trying her best to fill the shoes of a mom she didn't ever expect to be. I feel like motherhood, for me at least, is just something that happened...and keeps happening. As I look into these little faces who call me mom I can't help but think of how undeserving I feel to have them bless my life. Grateful for their presence for sure and for the lessons they teach me everyday. Somewhat scared that I see "little Sunnys" in them, and somewhat relieved, as I look at my reflection through their eyes and not through my own, I understand that yes, yes you do deserve them and
...YOU ARE A MOM!
Friday, November 11, 2011
Inspirational Time Out
Last weekend I took some time off with a friend of mine to go to Time Out for Women. We had a great time without kids or husbands or work of any kind!
We had a blast in out plush hotel room and got to eat at Joe's Crab Shack...and take our time!!!! (when I take my 2yr old out to eat, I feel like the faster I eat the less crazy he will get)
But the best part was listening to the speakers and hearing the inspiring music.
One of my favorite speakers was Emily Watts (author of many books like Being the Mom).
She gave us a few tips on How to be a Better Mom and Wife and Friend:
*Develop a Thick Skin - don't take things so personally, you will get hurt less and understand where people are coming from more...this also allows you to have a more Christ like view of others.
*Expect Hard Things - especially from your kids! if you expect more out of others then they will strive to achieve more. "The path to happiness is paved with whining." So, let then whine...
*Create Happy Traditions - make small, simple, inexpensive and non-time consuming traditions that add memories and joy to your family. (like singing a song before bed, having personal time with each kid once a month, or even a family pizza night) Simple pleasures make a house a home!
*Think of Yourself as a Person! - if you only feed yourself your kids breakfast leftovers, or never treat yourself to a new outfit...what kind of grouchy, malnourished, crazy woman will everyone have to put up with??? Treat yourself as you want to treat others! "Your family deserves a Mom who is a person!"
*Catch everyone doing something RIGHT - this goes for the kids, your husband, your friends, and even yourself! We go around all day long saying 'No' and correcting others actions and our own. Why not take some time out to notice when the kids are doing something good, and praise them for it. Tell your husband how much you appreciated him dressing the kids for school in the morning (even though no one had matching outfits and half of your daughters hair is filled with 10,000 hair bows).
I was really happy when she told us about all these simple and yet inspiring ideas to help me be a better woman. I tried out just a few of these after my 'Time Out' weekend and I felt the spirit so much stronger in my home. I felt more blessed to have a great husband and felt that I had a bit more patients for my active son.
The only person I missed was Hilary Weeks...but I found her on YouTube:
I am go grateful for so many wonderful blessings in my life and with my family. I hope that you can feel how much Heavenly Father has blessed you in your life as you strive to find more joy in each moment especially as we get close to the holiday season!
We had a blast in out plush hotel room and got to eat at Joe's Crab Shack...and take our time!!!! (when I take my 2yr old out to eat, I feel like the faster I eat the less crazy he will get)
But the best part was listening to the speakers and hearing the inspiring music.
One of my favorite speakers was Emily Watts (author of many books like Being the Mom).
She gave us a few tips on How to be a Better Mom and Wife and Friend:
*Develop a Thick Skin - don't take things so personally, you will get hurt less and understand where people are coming from more...this also allows you to have a more Christ like view of others.
*Expect Hard Things - especially from your kids! if you expect more out of others then they will strive to achieve more. "The path to happiness is paved with whining." So, let then whine...
*Create Happy Traditions - make small, simple, inexpensive and non-time consuming traditions that add memories and joy to your family. (like singing a song before bed, having personal time with each kid once a month, or even a family pizza night) Simple pleasures make a house a home!
*Think of Yourself as a Person! - if you only feed yourself your kids breakfast leftovers, or never treat yourself to a new outfit...what kind of grouchy, malnourished, crazy woman will everyone have to put up with??? Treat yourself as you want to treat others! "Your family deserves a Mom who is a person!"
*Catch everyone doing something RIGHT - this goes for the kids, your husband, your friends, and even yourself! We go around all day long saying 'No' and correcting others actions and our own. Why not take some time out to notice when the kids are doing something good, and praise them for it. Tell your husband how much you appreciated him dressing the kids for school in the morning (even though no one had matching outfits and half of your daughters hair is filled with 10,000 hair bows).
I was really happy when she told us about all these simple and yet inspiring ideas to help me be a better woman. I tried out just a few of these after my 'Time Out' weekend and I felt the spirit so much stronger in my home. I felt more blessed to have a great husband and felt that I had a bit more patients for my active son.
The only person I missed was Hilary Weeks...but I found her on YouTube:
I am go grateful for so many wonderful blessings in my life and with my family. I hope that you can feel how much Heavenly Father has blessed you in your life as you strive to find more joy in each moment especially as we get close to the holiday season!
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Wednesday, November 9, 2011
my real job
first off, i'd like to welcome myself back to blogging! yay! i have really missed it...have you missed us? we were all kind of off in reality, being stay at-home moms...you know the drill.
2 of my girlies got to spend an extended weekend with a beloved aunt, and last night was officially "pass-off" night...we both drove 2 1/2 hours to meet up in a kansas walmart so i could get my flesh and blood back in my possession. gee, i missed them! they are always so cute, but i love how cute they are when i haven't seen them in a while :)
while the girls promptly fell asleep in the back of the minivan--which, by the way, i love. you should get a minivan--i had the pleasure of listening to a cd of cherished songs from my childhood. i just let it play over and over and over...and i got to think over and over and over. it.was.great.
several of the songs are little children, singing about their mothers. they sing about mother watching over them while they sleep. they sing about their mother telling sweet stories. they sing about their mothers holding them. about a mother's smile, a mother's prayer, a mother's love.
it dawned on me as i listened to these sweet baby voices, that the real job of a mother is all of those things...it is to nurture and grow and love and teach these incredible little people in our care. so often we (and i mean me, i assume it's you too?) think of a mom's job as laundry and dishes and diapers and cleaning windows. and i guess that's part of it...i mean, i do think it is my responsibility to provide a clean environment for my children, to feed them and wash their clothes. but in all honesty, those are really caregiver jobs, the sort of stuff that can be done by any parent, any family member, any hired helper.
the real stuff of motherhood is often just as messy as oatmeal and yogurt smeared all over the kitchen table, even when it's less visible. our real job is to make sure that when our children think of "mother", they think of the time we spent with them. they think of the things we taught them. they think of our love, our smile...
today i need to mop my kitchen floor and put away about 17 loads of laundry. but then, i will have some snuggle time with my baby girl. i will have a meaningful and humorous conversation with my 11 year-old. i will listen intently to the important events in the life of a popular 2nd grader. i will hold the hand of my oldest daughter while she says her prayers. i will welcome the shower of kisses from an affectionate kindergarten boy.
because that is my real job...
2 of my girlies got to spend an extended weekend with a beloved aunt, and last night was officially "pass-off" night...we both drove 2 1/2 hours to meet up in a kansas walmart so i could get my flesh and blood back in my possession. gee, i missed them! they are always so cute, but i love how cute they are when i haven't seen them in a while :)
while the girls promptly fell asleep in the back of the minivan--which, by the way, i love. you should get a minivan--i had the pleasure of listening to a cd of cherished songs from my childhood. i just let it play over and over and over...and i got to think over and over and over. it.was.great.
several of the songs are little children, singing about their mothers. they sing about mother watching over them while they sleep. they sing about their mother telling sweet stories. they sing about their mothers holding them. about a mother's smile, a mother's prayer, a mother's love.
it dawned on me as i listened to these sweet baby voices, that the real job of a mother is all of those things...it is to nurture and grow and love and teach these incredible little people in our care. so often we (and i mean me, i assume it's you too?) think of a mom's job as laundry and dishes and diapers and cleaning windows. and i guess that's part of it...i mean, i do think it is my responsibility to provide a clean environment for my children, to feed them and wash their clothes. but in all honesty, those are really caregiver jobs, the sort of stuff that can be done by any parent, any family member, any hired helper.
the real stuff of motherhood is often just as messy as oatmeal and yogurt smeared all over the kitchen table, even when it's less visible. our real job is to make sure that when our children think of "mother", they think of the time we spent with them. they think of the things we taught them. they think of our love, our smile...
today i need to mop my kitchen floor and put away about 17 loads of laundry. but then, i will have some snuggle time with my baby girl. i will have a meaningful and humorous conversation with my 11 year-old. i will listen intently to the important events in the life of a popular 2nd grader. i will hold the hand of my oldest daughter while she says her prayers. i will welcome the shower of kisses from an affectionate kindergarten boy.
because that is my real job...
Friday, November 4, 2011
days like this...
I had a one track mind this morning. It was simply to get my kids to school "on time". However, we all woke up at 7:30...school starts at 8:00! Ugggh, seriously we sometimes forget that an alarm clock is useful. As I lifted my head off the pillow, looked over and read the time I thought "here we go again, annoying".
To my delight Matthew was laying next to my bed on the floor fully dressed, ready to go. I walked out of my room to wake Kenny up and he too was dressed with just his hair to wet down. Thank goodness. My anxiety to get them to school on time in part comes from me just naturally wanting to be responsible,and in part because we have been receiving notes in the kids' backpacks.
"you will be considered tardy if..." and
"if you are having trouble getting your children to school, we recommend letting them ride the bus".
Hopefully, these notes haven't been sent to JUST the Martins.
I got the kids in the car. Pulled up to the drop off lane and bent over to tie Matthews shoe (he's still learning), lifted my head up and the nice lady whom my husband swears is "overly" nice to him, was waving at me. I waved back. I scooted a little further up, the boys popped outta the car and the school principle was there to greet my boys good morning as they started up the steps. She slso waved at me,
smiled and then...there was this awkward look she gave me, kind of a look of confusion. As I drove away, I registered very quickly why she looked at me funny. I tilted my rear view mirror down to take a peak...and this is what I saw:
I mean only worse b/c on my way home I patted my hair down a little to make myself feel better...this was taken by Matt as I walked through the door after drop off. He too looked at me funny and then asked "did you wear a hat or anything? did anyone see you?" I couldn't help but laugh! My goal was to get the kids to school on time, and that didn't involve me getting "ready" in the least bit.
crazy,
hilarious,
frustrating,
joyful moments and all.
To my delight Matthew was laying next to my bed on the floor fully dressed, ready to go. I walked out of my room to wake Kenny up and he too was dressed with just his hair to wet down. Thank goodness. My anxiety to get them to school on time in part comes from me just naturally wanting to be responsible,and in part because we have been receiving notes in the kids' backpacks.
The school has been sending home reminders of:
"what time school starts" and"you will be considered tardy if..." and
"if you are having trouble getting your children to school, we recommend letting them ride the bus".
Hopefully, these notes haven't been sent to JUST the Martins.
I got the kids in the car. Pulled up to the drop off lane and bent over to tie Matthews shoe (he's still learning), lifted my head up and the nice lady whom my husband swears is "overly" nice to him, was waving at me. I waved back. I scooted a little further up, the boys popped outta the car and the school principle was there to greet my boys good morning as they started up the steps. She slso waved at me,
smiled and then...there was this awkward look she gave me, kind of a look of confusion. As I drove away, I registered very quickly why she looked at me funny. I tilted my rear view mirror down to take a peak...and this is what I saw:
I mean only worse b/c on my way home I patted my hair down a little to make myself feel better...this was taken by Matt as I walked through the door after drop off. He too looked at me funny and then asked "did you wear a hat or anything? did anyone see you?" I couldn't help but laugh! My goal was to get the kids to school on time, and that didn't involve me getting "ready" in the least bit.
Well, here's to being a mommy!
Embarrassing, crazy,
hilarious,
frustrating,
joyful moments and all.
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